Update

Been a while but fuck it I'm here to drop off some new ramblings. I just moved to the great town of Panama City and am enjoying it so far. Seeing my ole man and being by the beach is great. That is tempered with frustration at animals pissing and shitting all over the place. I haven't met any girls down here yet and that is due to my own apathy and not desiring to go out alone. Originally when I moved I had feelings of regret at leaving a certain girl back home whom I had developed "the feels" for. But alas my regret was regretful in itself due to the fact she was already getting dicked down a week after I moved. I harbor no feelings of bitterness or anger as I realize that it was bound to happen. I am just shamed I haven't found anything myself yet. But that is going to change as I am in the best shape of my life strength wise and am about to get signed as a model. I haven't been applying myself in school which needs to change and I need to involve core and cardio in my workouts. I am going to start recording what I eat and applying myself in school for the first time since freshman year. This Islamic State problem infuriates me and I want their heads on a platter. I want them dead and I want to be the person to end them. At this point I have no logical way to see that through. I am going to focus and school and lifting in the meantime along with spending time with my family. My prior despair has hardened itself as mate that manifests itself in hard forged iron that I pick up and put down in a semi controlled manner whenever I travel to my home away from home to let out anger. Iron therapy and consistent masturbation are the things that keep me sane. That and a borderline obsession with keeping up with the news. Anyways peace homes and remember today is the day to be a motherfucking winner!